I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
