i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
