This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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