Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
