glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize