apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
And the cops told us we were all naked.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I licked your asshole in confidence.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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