I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
