She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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