you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
