Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize