Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
