He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
