Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
