just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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