Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
