so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
