I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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