Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
