My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Randomize
