I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize
