You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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