You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
no you cant smoke seaweed
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
