it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
