Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I would fuck him just for his dog
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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