So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
