That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Randomize
