Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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