I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Sorry about my life...
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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