Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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