then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
