Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
