I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
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