I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
