Is it normal to miss your booty call?
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
This couple is walking their pig around campus
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
