Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Do vagina's smell?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
