The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
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