We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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