i just wanna soil my oats bro
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
