I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
