if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
