matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
