Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I touched a dick in church today
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
