My hair reeks of homosexuality.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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