Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
