No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
