Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
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