vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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