Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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