"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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