I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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